My scheduled ultrasound last Friday was like a mental "brick wall". I couldn't see anything beyond that moment. Even sat in the waiting room with Peter I told him that I couldn't think beyond that green door! I was indescribably nervous that something had gone wrong and that bad news lay the other side.
Even when I was lying back on the bed and the Gynaecologist had started the scan I was still thinking the worst, as some form of self-defense I guess. Even when he reminded me of the "baby house" that I had seen 3 weeks earlier, and then pointed to the baby, my heart still didn't relax.
"Is it ok?" I asked
"Perfect!" he said
Still the tension refused to let up.
"And the heart?" I questioned.....
"Here" he said pointing at the screen, "boom, boom, boom" he uttered...... with that he flicked a few switches and the room was filled with the sound of my little miracle's heartbeat! Even now it brings a smile to my face and a tear to my eye!
At that moment my body relaxed and I finally felt a connection to this little being that I had so desperately been craving over the last 3 weeks! Something...someone..was definitely growing..thriving..inside of me.
In all my years I shall never forget that moment!